


Hot Springs are NOT for Spying

by HBossWrites



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon-typical language, F/F, F/M, Multi, Peeping, Pre-Relationship negotiations and flirting, RvB Rare Pair Week, Unrealistic Amounts of Forgiveness, York is an accidental pervert, and a non-accidental pervert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2019-05-05 03:44:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14608575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HBossWrites/pseuds/HBossWrites
Summary: There was Vanessa Kimball, General Kimball herself, stripped out of her armor and peeling out of her bodysuit. The whole thing was just a well-organized jumble on the floor, but York couldn’t focus on that when there was a long expanse of warm, dark shoulders standing right in front of him, being completely, accidentally, incredibly sexy.Holy fuck! York’s mind unhelpfully supplied, I’m gonna see Kimball fucking naked!Shit!





	Hot Springs are NOT for Spying

York could see why outsiders didn’t think much of Chorus. Between the radioactive lakes, the bears that could rip a warthog in half, and the civil war that decimated the population down to a small fraction, there was not a whole lot to say for the planet to make up for her many pitfalls. It managed to be hot, cold, humid, dry, mountainous, cavernous, and swampy all in the span of a less than a hundred miles around the base that these people had claimed as their home while the leaders of the planet argued with the UNSC about supplies and protection.

However, the one thing Chorus _absolutely_ had going for her was right underneath this base.

**_Natural hot springs._ **

The whole base was built on a system of caves and caverns that had the most _epic_ rock formations underneath, filled with glittering precious stones, natural venting, and soothing, steamy water. These babies were used to produce power, reduce power consumption for heating water by pumping it directly to the showers, and were self-cleaning.

York loved the underground hot springs.

The use of the springs as baths seemed to be highly restricted, likely for both safety and sanitation, since most of the time they were one of the few places on the base that you would be able to be completely alone for _hours_. Well, he was _pretty_ sure the whole place was restricted, but he’d been able to pick the locks pretty easily, and if that wasn’t an open invitation, he didn’t know what was.

He laid on top of one of the warm rock formations, pretty well hidden from the rest of the room, and let the heat melt his muscles and bones into a puddle of relaxation. Carolina would be busy doing important soldier stuff for a few hours yet and he could use the nap.

Things were…different on Chorus. He’d found her, she’d found him, and it was…

He didn’t want to say they picked up where they left off, because where they’d left off, she was depressed and angry and anxious all the time, and he’d been…well, he hadn’t exactly been much better off. They’d been fighting each other and fighting for their lives, and then they both thought the other was dead and it was just a bad time for everyone.

But then, _Chorus,_ and there was Carolina, all passion and heat and _life_ and she still wanted him.

And he still wanted her.

They’d found each other, fallen together, and had barely spent any time apart since. It was only when she went into meetings where he could not follow that he had any time to himself.

York didn’t mind.

He’d done the lone wolf thing and didn’t really enjoy it. He much preferred the conjoined to his lover thing to the alone all the time thing.

But sometimes…sometimes alone naps were nice, too.

He really needed it.

“God, I need this.”

He jerked, his eyes snapped open, and he slid quietly down he rock to the ground and out of sight, heart pounding, and peeked around the rock. His eyes were blown wide at the view in front of him.

There was Vanessa Kimball, General Kimball herself, stripped out of her armor and peeling out of her bodysuit. The whole thing was just a well-organized jumble on the floor, but York couldn’t focus on that when there was a long expanse of warm, dark shoulders standing right in front of him, being completely, accidentally, _incredibly_ sexy.

_Holy fuck!_ York’s mind unhelpfully supplied, _I’m gonna see Kimball fucking naked!_

_Shit!_

He hadn’t even realized the fucking door had opened!

The General didn’t hate him, but it was pretty clear to anyone who saw them together that York still wasn’t her favorite of the Freelancers who’d crashed on the planet. She was always polite, more so than anyone in any military command structure had ever been, but when York saw how affirming, warm, and _close_ she was to just about every person on the planet but him and a few really obnoxious Feds, it was pretty clear he was low on the list of people Kimball wanted to play Grifball with.

He ducked back behind the rocks as the bodysuit started to fall from her shoulders and show _back_.

He could reveal himself now, while she still at least had underwear on, admit that he’d broken into the secured area, and endure her well placed wrath. The pro was that she’d probably be less pissed than if she discovered him later.

The obvious con was that she’d be pissed at him for breaking into what was proooobably a restricted area, and he’d see her partly naked, which wouldn’t improve their relationship any.

He could stay hidden and still, and hope that she just didn’t notice him for the duration of her soak. Kimball was always so busy, there was no way she’d have more than an hour to spare in the water. He could wait her out, never reveal himself, and she’d never know.

Pros; if she didn’t know, she wouldn’t get mad at him. No mad, no problem. He hadn’t seen enough skin to feel like a peeping tom, so he shouldn’t feel guilty. Shouldn’t was probably not the right word though, because he could already feel the guilt crawling up his spine, and the guilt felt correct in this instance.

Cons; aside from the guilt, he was totally invading her space. She was alone, which meant that this was one of the few moments she’d managed to snag just for herself where no one was bothering her to fix this or do that and she could just _be_ , and just by being there he was violating her privacy. The room also echoed like fuck, which meant as soon as she started paying attention to the world around her and stopped making noise, the slightest wrong move or sound would give him away.

York heard the water splash.

_Fuck. Too late._

Kimball was in the water now. Trying to relax.

Probably naked.

He peeked around the rocks and saw her underwear piled on top of her bodysuit.

Definitely naked.

_Fuck._

He was committed.

_Shit._

Kimball groaned, and the water sloshed around.

York ducked back behind the rock. He did _not_ want to get his dumb ass caught. How would he explain this to Carolina? Fuck, how would he explain this to _Kimball_?

Sorry for violating the very specific and very strict rules you set in place for me and also for staring at your naked body and listening to you while you did whatever the fuck it is you did in private?

That would go over **really** well.

“Nnngh. God.”

She let out a few deep pants of breath.

“Fucking _spine_.”

York bit his lip.

Carolina had mentioned Kimball’s old back injury once or twice, something about being captured and an explosion and a bunch of people dying, and her face would always scrunch up in sympathetic concern, and then York would have to unleash cuddles of epic levels because sad Carolina was heartbreaking. Kimball probably really needed a good soak to loosen up the muscles and get the bones relaxed back into their proper places, and this place was unfiltered so it was full of all kinds of minerals and stuff that was supposed to be good for people in chronic pain.

But he was _spying_ on her.

Even if he wasn’t looking at her, just by being there, he was spying.

And that was high on the ‘shitty things to do to a person, especially a woman you don’t want to actively hate you, but also just shitty in general’.

“Mmm.”

The water splashed again.

York imagined she was probably stretching in the water.

She made the same kind of noises after a particularly rough training session, they were just a heck of a lot louder between the echoes and her not being afraid of being overheard and told that she’s _pushing too hard_ or she’s **not fit enough for that kind of workout** , both of which were untrue. York had seen the woman train and she was good for someone who hadn’t had actual, specialized training. He knew she knew it was all bullshit, but it still had to be annoying for her to hear day in and day out when she worked so hard to be respected.

He could practically see her, floating, twisting herself this way and that without the force of gravity holding her in place. Her long, thin, black braids would bob around head and shoulders in a fan and wind lazily as she moved. The water would make her skin glisten and the lights would reflect off the natural crystal formations to mix with the steam in the air, and make the whole thing look like she was some kind of water nymph in an enchanted pond or something like that.

York wasn’t really up on his fantasy creatures, but…god if she didn’t sound ethereal and enchanting _without_ being in a fucking echo chamber of nakedness.

Aaaaand, now he _definitely_ couldn’t just reveal himself.

York mentally cursed at himself for choosing _today of all days_ to do the civilian thing and wear tight jeans. Carolina enjoyed them because they showed off his ass (and York wasn’t too shy to admit that his ass was fucking brilliant), and he liked them because they made Carolina all lip-licky and twinkly eyed.

He didn’t think Kimball would appreciate the front view though, what with a goddamned boner where _anyone_ could see it.

His dick had betrayed him again.

“Haaaahh. Hmmm.”

York gripped his knees hard and took a slow breath.

It was fine. He was fine.

She wasn’t going to see, so she wasn’t going to know.

Everything was going to be A-Ok.

Except, on the other side of the rock was a beautiful, intelligent, strong, powerful woman. A woman that had no qualms about smacking a person down if they stepped out of line, which was so goddamned hot. She was _naked_ and _moaning_ and just…

And she hadn’t given him permission to look at her, let alone think about her in that context. So he shouldn’t. So he _wouldn’t_. But fuck if part of him didn’t want to, just a little.

And he felt like the _shittiest_ boyfriend. Because what guy wants to look at another woman when they’ve got their truly, madly waiting for them? What kind of guy wants to creep on someone who’d been nothing but kind to them?

York was a dick. The dickiest of dicks.

He didn’t deserve Carolina, that was for sure.

She deserved better than a man who couldn’t keep bad thoughts out of his head.

Kimball let out a soft moan. The water splashed softly against the rocks.

In his minds eye he could see her, running her hands down her body, sliding her hand-

No! York, no! Bad thoughts!

She huffed, and York could see her stretching out, scars bare for the world to see. She’d be gorgeous and unashamed and smile at him the way she did at Carolina when she thought no one was looking, and he’d-

_YORK! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!_

He squeezed his knees tighter.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

He wasn’t going to be able to handle a full hour of this. Not with his body and his mind betraying him in equal measure.

He needed help.

Every splash made him wince, every sound she made sent shivers down his spine, every noise sent a new fantasy spiraling through his head.

He didn’t get it.

It’s not like he was hard up. Carolina was just as enthusiastic and eager as he was about the life affirming aspects of sex, and he didn’t usually get this wound up over just anyone.

Maybe it was how Kimball gave zero fucks.

Maybe York was just a fetishizing asshole.

Maybe he just…couldn’t keep it in his pants.

God, he needed, like, a therapist or something, because this was a hell of a lot more than just his spank bank filling up with fun new material.

He was genuinely sexually attracted to the general and her sexy, sexy body.

Her badass personality, intelligence, kindness, and quick-witted sense of humor didn’t hurt either.

The door slid open and the water splashed like crazy. Kimball’s voice seemed to make the walls fucking shake.

“GET OUT!”

“Vanessa,” and that was Carolina’s voice.

What was Carolina doing in here?

“I’M IN THE WATER!”

Carolina growled in that way she did when her fear and anxiety came out like anger and York hoped to the gods that Kimball knew her well enough to know that.

“York is missing.”

Oh fuck.

The water sloshed.

Oh _fuck_.

“What?”

Oh FUCK!

“He’s missing. No one can find him, he’s not answering his handheld radio, his armor is still here, but he’s not.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, shit, fuck!!!

The water splashed like crazy and suddenly, Kimball was out of the water and wrapping a towel around herself.

York was so fucking thankful she’d covered everything.

“How long?”

“I don’t know. A few hours, maybe. I saw him right before our meeting.”

“Ok, I’ll send out an alert, we’ll put a call over the PA. It’ll be ok. I’m sure he’s just sleeping somewhere he shouldn’t be or dicking around with the kids. He likes to do the sportsball stuff. He’s fine, Carolina. I’m sure he’s fine.”

Carolina bit back a sob, and York felt like the _biggest_ asshole.

“I’m sorry. I know it’s stupid-“

“It’s not, and you’re not. You have every right to be concerned, you already lost him once. I won’t let you lose him again.”

Kimball leaned down and fished a handheld radio out of the pile.

York gulped.

He got a _fantastic_ view of her chest from that angle. At least she wasn’t facing away from him.

York was a bad man.

God, York was going to _hell_.

Kimball and Carolina were going to kill him, and he was going to hell.

“Communications, this is General Kimball, please send out an alert for Agent York to reveal himself and check in immediately. If he does not respond, send a message over the PA.”

[ _Confirmed, General. We’ll find him._ ]

She nodded and dropped the radio into the pile of clothes.

“We are **going** to find him.”

Carolina dropped her head against Kimball’s shoulder and let out a soft, vulnerable noise. Kimball wrapped her arms around Carolina and…wasn’t that an interesting view? That wasn’t the kind of hug York was used to seeing women give each other. Certainly not the kind of hug he’d ever seen Carolina give South or Connie back in the day. Those hugs were always short; affectionate, but comfortably distant. This was an intimate, full body maneuver, that said they were both well versed in pressing certain parts against one another.

Huh.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be bothering you when you’re relaxing.”

“It’s fine, I’m not worried about the bath.”

“Not the bath, the…York thing.”

“Carolina…”

Carolina pressed her face into the crook of Kimball’s neck. Kimball pulled Carolina by her hips and gave her a tight squeeze and...

Had York fallen asleep again?

“I just can’t lose him again.”

“I know.”

“I didn’t want to lose you either.”

Kimball ran her hands up and down Carolina’s back.

“You haven’t lost me, I’m right here, just where I should be if you need me.”

_Oh…_

**_OH!_ **

_Fuck, me, man! Kimball and Carolina?!_

“It’s not fair. You shouldn’t have to-“

“Life isn’t made up of should and shouldn’t. It’s made of do’s and don’ts. I do want you here, and if that means learning to like your boyfriend, that’s what I’ll do.”

“But…we…”

“I always knew that if he came back, he was in first, Carolina. That’s…that’s just how it is. I’m not upset. Honestly, I’m happy.”

“Happy?”

Shit.

That was the wrong thing for Kimball to say.

Carolina pulled back, face twisted up and pissed off.

“What do you mean, happy? Were you really that eager to get rid of me?”

“Carolina, your boyfriend, who you broke up with under the absolute _worst_ circumstances, isn’t actually dead. He’s alive and he wants you and you want him, and _yes_ , I am happy you get to have that because it’s so _rare_ to get something happy and beautiful here. We are surrounded by loss and death and grief every day, so you finding joy? That makes me happy. I want you to be happy and healing more than I want you in my bed. I want you happy with him more than I want you miserable without him.”

Carolina whimpered.

Oh.

That…actually explained a lot.

Her obsessive knowledge about the General that York originally thought was just about protecting the woman or having very limited female friends on the planet.

Stalking Kimball to make sure she got from point A to B without trouble _could_ have been about stopping assassins (and they had caught a few would be’s and also one secret admirer), but it was probably at least a little about this.

Sneaking food into the woman’s office at random intervals and just saying ‘she needs to eat’, and Kimball’s shy smiles when Carolina made her stop working to put food in her mouth.

Carolina slipping off Kimball’s helmet to play with her hair when she was stressed out.

The dreams where she muttered out ‘ _Vanessa, Vanessa’_ and whined before she clung to York like she thought he was gonna disappear.

Because one of them _had_ disappeared.

And apparently the other had left her.

Well…this was a fine kettle of fish.

The radio buzzed.

[ _General Kimball, he has not responded to either attempt. Should we search the base?_ ]

“Please do, and report back as soon as you find him.”

[ _Confirmed._ ]

Kimball stepped back and grabbed Carolina’s shoulders.

“We are going to find him. Let me get dressed and we’ll look for him ourselves. The man won’t stay hidden for long.”

York squeezed his eyes shut just as Vanessa moved to drop her towel and held back a gulp.

Fuck. If he _actually_ saw her naked without her permission, neither woman would ever forgive him, and they’d be right not to. Holy _fuck,_ why did he think not saying anything was the better option? It was too goddamned late now, and he was so screwed.

He’d never be able to convince them it was an accident.

“Thank you, Vanessa.”

“You don’t need to thank me for taking care of you, Carolina. Ever.”

“Still…”

They left the room and the door slid shut.

York still held his breath and waited a moment, but no one came back in. He slipped out from his hiding spot and crept over to the door. He didn’t know if anyone was watching, but he didn’t think there were cameras, since they did use this particular section specifically for naked activities.

Carolina and Kimball probably had naked time in there.

BRAIN! NO!

GOING TO HELL!

He popped up the access panel to unlock the door, but the whole system was completely locked up and sending out constant pings and code changes the way the locks would do when someone realized he was somewhere he wasn’t supposed to be. Epsilon had rigged the whole thing up after he told Kimball that York was an expert lockpicker.

If York tried to break it like this, while everyone was on high alert, they’d come in guns blazing.

“Well…shit.”

There was no way out that left him in a good position.

Which was pretty much the story of York’s goddamned life at this point, but it still wasn’t what he’d hoped for.

He grabbed his handheld radio, sighed, and bit the bullet.

“Hey, um, communications? This is Agent York.”

An angry sounding guy’s voice came over the speaker. Carolina’s bitchy AI had apparently taken over the search, which was _super_ fun.

York hadn’t really gotten the chance to get to know Epsilon before everything went to shit, but man, dealing with him after they’d ended up on Chorus? The AI was a fucking asshole and apparently **hated** York, for reasons the man barely understood.

Probably because of all the hot sex York had with Carolina.

[ _Are you in the hot springs?_ ]

“Yeah.”

[ _Kimball’s hot springs?_ ]

“Yes.”

[ _You are so dead. Carolina and Kimball are going to fight over who gets to murder you first._ ]

York sighed and sat op top of the rocks.

He was gonna take whatever lumps they thought he deserved.

Carolina was probably going to break up with him.

She was going to break up with him and start dating Kimball again.

They’d…do stuff together that York had only ever seen in pornography and he’d be stuck fighting for his life on he base, trying desperately not to get murdered by the people who loved their general and the people who didn’t want Carolina’s heart being broken.

The door slid open.

“YORK!”

Carolina flew across the room and slammed into him. She caught him in a tight, bone crushing hug. He groaned and wrapped his arms around her as well. She couldn’t pummel him too badly if she was too close.

“What the fuck were you doing?!”

“I fell asleep. The rocks in here are really warm and-“

Kimball strode in.

“Hi, General.”

“My office, now.”

Carolina’s whole face twisted.

“Vanessa-“

“York! MARCH!”

He pulled back a little, even as Carolina squeezed him tighter.

“It’s ok, ‘Lina.”

Carolina shook her head.

“She’s going to murder you.”

Kimball’s expression didn’t change, but York thought she might have actually been…well, not just mad, but kind of sad, too. He wouldn’t blame her, he always got sad when Carolina was upset. It was a natural reaction to someone so strong breaking in front of you.

“Well, then I’m sorry I’m a fuckup and I’m glad we got to have the extra time.”

He kissed Carolina’s temple.

“I love you.”

\-----

Kimball’s office was weirdly homey.

It had the layout and color scheme of those cold, sterile corporate offices, but she’d decorated the place with paintings from some of the Chorus soldiers had made for her, and she’d trimmed the furniture and the walls with her signature ice blue. The place felt like her, classy, sophisticated, but also weirdly accepting.

He really didn’t want to die in her office, though.

“Agent York-“

She scowled and sat down behind her desk. She did not look particularly happy with him, but she wasn’t radiating _near_ the amount of rage he’d expected from her.

Maybe she just had it really tight to her chest.

Her sexy, sexy chest.

That York was _not_ going to think about.

“General Kimball, I want to be completely honest with you.”

“I’m listening.”

York had never felt quite so small, not even during the Project, when the Director flat out told York he’d be castrated and flung into space if he was caught violating the man’s daughter.

“I was…fuck. Ok. I was in there the whole time you were, but I swear to god I wasn’t looking! I was sleeping and then you were inside and then by the time I realized what was happening, you were in the water and I didn’t want you to think I was creeping on you, except I _was_ because I couldn’t just turn my ears off, but I swear to god I wasn’t in there to be a creep I was just-“

“Why didn’t you mark the room as occupied?”

York blinked.

“Do what, now?”

“There are multiple springs. If you’d marked the room as occupied, I would have chosen a different one. Why didn’t you?”

He blinked harder.

“You can do that?!”

She sighed and gripped the bridge of her nose.

“Yes, York, you can do that. I’m guessing you weren’t in there under legitimate means?”

“I see a lock, I pick a lock, if no one comes to arrest me, I sneak in. It’s a bad habit.”

“A habit that could have gotten you shot for creeping. Again.”

“To be fair, the last time I almost got shot for creeping around I wasn’t being a pervert, I was just checking to see if I was _going_ to be shot.”

“And you were.”                                        

York’s shoulders fell.

“I am honestly, truly, so sorry.”

“Do you understand why I’m angry?”

“Aside from the fact I could have seen you naked? You were finally alone, and I ruined that. I ruined it by being a creep and listening, even if I wasn’t looking.”

“You didn’t look the whole time?”

York winced.

“Carolina came in, and you were in a towel, which was _way_ more than I should have seen without permission.”

“Yeah,” she ground out, “it is.”

“And I am so sorry. I mean, like, words can’t describe how sorry I am. This isn’t the kind of…”

“What? Not the kind of guy you are?”

“Not the kind I want to be, at least. Look, if you need to stick me in a cell or something to let everyone know that kind of thing isn’t ok, I…I won’t fight it. I’ve earned it.”

Kimball took a slow, deep breath through her nose.

“You scared Carolina. _That_ is why I’m angry.”

“You…really care a lot about her.”

“Don’t play dumb, York. You were in the room, I’m sure you can put two and two together.”

York shifted in his seat.

“She still loves you, you know?”

Kimball shook her head and pointed York to the door.

“Get out.”

“Ok, that’s fair. I’m just gonna…”

York motioned toward the door.

“Agent York, leave!”

“Leaving!”

\-----

York shuffled off to the room he shared with Carolina, certain that every person he passed could feel his shame resonate off of him in waves.

He was a bad man.

The door was locked.

Carolina always locked it, sure, but she’d never changed his code before.

Shit.

He knocked.

The door slid open. Carolina was wearing her casual clothes.

“Um…”

She pointed to the bed.

“Get in here.”

York dragged his feet and sat down on the bed. There wasn’t room for much in the space, a small dresser, space to store their armor, and a bed. It was a functional space, sure, but it didn’t leave a lot of room for the collection of…much of anything. Books, toys, games, even a rock collection wouldn’t be easy to keep in that space.

Carolina took York’s hand and gave it a squeeze.

“What’s going to happen?”

He shrugged.

“She’s mad at me.”

“But are you going into a cell?”

“Doesn’t seem like it. She’s an angel of mercy.”

 “You were being a peeper.”

Carolina sounded so disappointed in him.

“I wasn’t! I really did just fall asleep! And then she was there! And naked! And how was I supposed to tell her?!”

“You could have said something at any time and she’d be less mad. You do realize she’s been sending me messages basically non stop, ranting about you?”

“Sounds like an average Tuesday!”

Carolina scowled and smacked York with a pillow.

She was…a lot less pissed than he’d expected given the circumstances.

“There is nothing average about this, York. I’m surprised she hasn’t stuck you in a cell and thrown away the key.”

“I’m not.”

Carolina cocked her head.

“Why?”

“It’d make you sad, and if there’s one thing I’ve figured out about Kimball is that she’s not a big fan of you being sad.”

Carolina spared him a sad little smile and leaned her head against his shoulder.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

“You don’t even know what I’m sorry for.”

He pressed a kiss to the side of her head.

“You’re still in love with the sexy general lady. That’s ok. I don’t mind.”

She sat up, shoulders tense.

“What?”

“I don’t mind, Carolina. If I’m being honest, I kinda like it? Like, if you dumped me forever, I’d be sad, but…I like how happy you are with her.”

“Well, I can’t be with you both.”

“Why not?”

She looked baffled by the idea, and York got it. From the stories she’d told him about her parents, the idea of a threesome, let alone a triad was a concept she had no idea what to do with.

Still, York was openminded. If Carolina wanted to have a sexy girlfriend and a sexy boyfriend, he’d be willing to be the sexy boyfriend in this equation.

Not the sexy girlfriend, though. He liked being the only man in this scenario. Two women to cuddle with at night, two women to have dinner with, two women to have _dessert_ with, which was like a penthouse fantasy.

Still, that wasn’t a step they could take while Kimball was mad at him.

“How do I fix it?”

“Fix it? York, you spied on her naked. You can’t fix this.”

“I can try. I don’t want her to hate me forever, if only because it puts you in a bad spot.”

Carolina shook her head and looked down at the datapad on the bed. There was a long string of individual messages, all of them from Kimball, and all within the past hour.

“You’re lucky she thinks you’re cute.”

“She thinks I’m cute? Pr-O-mising!”

York singsonged.

“You just want to see her naked, you perv.”

Shit…he’d been found out!

“Ok, you’ve found me. I think she’s pretty and she’s awesome and I’d very much like the chance to watch you two make out. I also wouldn’t mind being allowed to see her naked in the future.”

“Again.”

“I never saw her naked this time! Not really!”

Carolina snorted.

“You are so lucky I understand your brain, because if I didn’t, you wouldn’t have a girlfriend anymore.”

“I’m the luckiest damned cyclops on the planet. So…any ideas about how to get the boss lady to forgive me enough to…consider trading kisses under the bleachers, or something?”

Carolina frowned at the blankets.

“I…may have an idea, actually?”

\----

York waited a few days, because he was a tactful person, and also because Carolina told him it was probably better to let Kimball cool down and let Carolina lay the groundwork. He trusted his aqua/teal/greenish-blue girlfriend to make things nice and smooth.

He knocked on Kimball’s office door and tried to keep the nerves out of his smile. He could do this. He could make this happen without insulting or humiliating himself or others. He could win over _one_ woman, even if she was really smart and good at telling when people were being screwups and stupid around her.

York could do this because _he was_ _charming_ , goddamn it!

The office door opened.

Kimball took one look at him and her whole body tensed up like a spring.

“Agent York?”

He shifted where he stood, flowers in hand, and the nicest cardigan he could get North to loan him. The man was so particular about his clothing.

“Please don’t be mad. Can I come in?”

He thrust the bundle of flowers into her arms and smiled wider. Her eyes were like a startled deer’s, a little bit freaked and a lot ready to bolt. She looked down at the flowers, then back to York.

Still, she stepped back into the room and let York in.

“What _is_ this?”

“I wanted to say I’m sorry for what happened, and I thought that I could humiliate myself or something to put us back on a more even playing field, but you hate people being embarrassed because of that residual anxiety that you get or whatever it’s called.”

She blinked.

“Sympathetic embarrassment.”

York nodded eagerly.

“Right, you hate when people get embarrassed because you can feel it just like it’s happening to you. So I was thinking then, I could break into your office and leave you a present to show that I’m trying to be considerate, but breaking and entering is what caused the problem in the first place, and it’d be a bad idea to try to be considerate by being inconsiderate.”

 “Please, never break into my office.”

She moved to set the flowers on the desk, then grimaced and looked around the room. York smiled and held out the vase he’d brought with him, well aware that it was silly to offer her a bouquet and a vase as two separate things, but if she couldn’t handle the quirks, this whole mess would never work out.  

“Thank…you?”

York helped her get the flowers into the vase, set the vase on Kimball’s desk, and fluffed the flowers a little to fill it out in an attractive manner. Her eyebrows furrowed a little as he did it, but her mouth twisted into a little, amused smile.

He straightened the vase and moved it to the side a little, so she’d still have a good view of her whole office when she sat down to work.

“Right, so I thought, what’s the best way to say ‘I’m a jackass and I screwed up and I’m sorry for breaking into your bathroom and seeing you partially naked?’.”

She groaned and put her face into her hands.

“York!”

“Right! So I redid the security systems!”

Kimball’s eyes shot up and her whole face twisted in fury.

“YOU **_WHAT?!_** ”

_Shit!_

That was _not_ the response he was hoping for!

“I didn’t do it alone! I had communications and security help me! They knew what was happening, and I’m like 60% less likely to be able to break into places now without being immediately caught! Also, Epsilon helped!”

York saw Kimball’s whole body slump down just a bit. He knew she liked the little glowing asshole, all the Chorus people did for some unfathomable reason, and he hoped the name would tamp down a little of the rage.

It worked. She deflated.

“Oh.”

“And, I went ahead and implemented a scheduling system and a check in alert system with Carolina, so she can find me anywhere on the planet.”

Kimball nodded, but clearly didn’t get it.

That was ok, York was gearing up toward the big, one two punch. She’d get it pretty soon.

“I also sent it to you.”

She blinked and sat down at her desk.

“What? Why?”

“Because when something goes wrong and I fuck up, you’re the first person she goes to. This way, if she panics, it’s easily solved instead of having your favorite super soldier having fits.”

Kimball laughed and rubbed a leaf between her fingers. It was cute, honestly.

“Thank you, Agent York, I…this is…really more than I expected from you.”

“And…”

She sighed, her voice was clearly disappointed.

“What else?”

York’s grin went up a notch.

“I’d like to know if you’re available for dinner tonight?”

 “What could you possibly have to say that requires that? We’re talking right now.”

She stopped rubbing the leaf and reached for her datapad.

“Well, I’d like to actually have dinner with you, get to know you, and maybe try to convince you to make out for a while?”

Kimball put the datapad down and shook her head. She burst into laughter and dropped her head to the desk. Her shoulders quivered as she tried to stifle the giggles.

York…didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

“Don’t you think Carolina would be a little upset knowing you’re trying to take me out to dinner and make out?”

“Not really, it was kind of her idea.”

Kimball sat up straight and shook her head.

“She wants us to try and be friends to reduce stress?”

“Actually, I think she’s hoping you’ll find my ineptitude and stupidity charming enough to open up options for a love triangle.”

Kimball blinked.

“What?”

Her voice went flat, but York wouldn’t let that throw him. Kimball would listen. She was good at listening.

“Look, she’s still in love with you, and she’s _broken_ over losing you. I didn’t see it right away because I didn’t know what I was looking for. I could see she was wrecked, but being the self-absorbed jackass I am, I assumed it was because of me, or the war, or mental trauma. I didn’t realize the thing that was giving her nightmares and making her paranoid and sick was just that she was missing you.”

Kimball clearly didn’t believe it. She rubbed anxiously at her neck and shoved her hair over her shoulder.

“I’m…I’m right here. I didn’t go anywhere.”

“No, but you’re not _with_ her. Look, Vanessa-“

“Don’t call me that.”

York stopped.

“Ok.”

She glared at him, hard, then turned to look out the window.

He’d fucked up.

York wasn’t sure _how_ he’d fucked up. But he’d fucked up.

Shit.

This was why he’d wanted Carolina in the room while he did this. He wasn’t so good with the fixing of things.

“I wasn’t trying to make demands or anything. I’m…I’m sorry. I’m such a jackass, I knew this wasn’t going to work, but-“

“Stop. Talking.”

York’s teeth clacked together.

Kimball stood up and put her hand against the glass. Her eyes went far away for a few seconds.

“Don’t call me that. I _hate_ that word. I can’t hear it and not want to throw up.”

“Trauma?”

“Infiltrator. He was good. Wormed his way in, pretended to be a friendly while he murdered us from the inside out. He refused to call me by my title, or my last name, always…”

“Always that name.”

“And it makes me sick.”

York nodded.

“Ok. Should I just keep using the full title? General Kimball? Because that could be hot, but it could also get really uncomfortable in the bedroom.”

Kimball flipped him off.

“Someone’s feeling confident.”

“If I don’t believe in myself, no one else will!”

She laughed a little, less bright, but no less genuine.

“Kim works. Ness, too. Nessa on a good day, but in public? General.”

“Gotcha!”

York rounded the desk and leaned against the window.

“So…dinner tonight?”

Kimball smiled, soft and exasperated and a little bit fond, just the way Carolina did when she didn’t know what to do with him. He was gonna end up with two of them!

Man, was York the luckiest man ever, or what?!

“Sure. You’ll have to wait until I have a break, and I’m probably going to have to cut it short, what with you deciding to spring this on me now, instead of sending me a memo and asking me to clear a spot in my schedule.”

“I can live with that this time. And…you’re ok with the other part?”

“Well, we’ll have to see how that goes, won’t we? The whole point of a date is to get to know the other person, so…bring your A-Game.”

York grinned.

“Can do, Kim!”

He turned to leave.

“And if I ever find out you spied on me without permission again, I will neuter you.”

“Does that imply there will be a time where I’m allowed to spy on you?”

She gave him a sly smile.

“I guess that depends on how dinner goes.”

“You are both sexy and terrifying. I understand _exactly_ what Carolina sees in you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here's my first ever proper submission for RvB RarePairs Week! I have to say, I enjoyed writing this one a lot more than I expected to! I hope you liked it!


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